One of my best friends was called upon by the school office. He was one of the brightest and a very good human. After a while he came back with a big smile on his face. He was through with great results. I was happy too...(wait a minute ! something started building inside me, it was like a splinter). I started thinking- what about me?, does this mean that my friend was the only one got through?.
While congratulating him, my mind was busy with "my self". thirty minutes later I found out lot of my friends including "my self" were through. Yet a feeling of guiltiness spread through me for not been able to be fully happy for my friend's success just a few minutes back.
That day I felt the dumbness of jealousy. It's an acute state of mind that shrinks our mind and heart. And most of the time, my experience with jealousy has nothing to do with what I want. It's quite humorous at times.
From 2000, for 10 years I kept on contemplating on this feeling, when ever I stumbled upon it. Worst thing that happens is that it hinders the ability to see the opportunities. Jealousy induces the dumbness. That's all, there it is.
Sometimes in the journey of life I find my self ahead and some other times lagging. It's nothing but relative thinking. A thought that captivates us and binds us to the wheel of desire.
End of the day it's a waste of thoughts and an opportunity cost. !
